It’s like walking on eggshells.
You bring up something small and ‘snap!’, you two are arguing. This happens again and again, different topic, same fight.
And these fights are leaving scars, you are starting to think:
“I am not good enough”
“I am going to end up alone”
“I am a failure”
I am not wanted”
These arguments are starting over the smallest of things. You want to feel heard by your partner…you want them to care. It seems every time you try to talk to your partner, they shut down. It’s infuriating.
Or maybe you are the one who does the shutting down. lence after an argument feels deadly, like a chasm widening between you two. You feel lonely in this relationship and just want to figure out how to express things so that you are finally heard and understood. Sometimes, this relationship may feel like just too much work and you worry that you will eventually end up alone.
Communication has become like a minefield; you never know when saying something is going to end in a blow up. Even when you think you are doing things ‘right’, you are still told it isn’t good enough. You feel stuck between a rock and a hard place and wonder if you will ever be ‘good enough’ for your partner.
How I help you
My treatment for couples in conflict has a few phases.
Phase 1. I give you quick relief and a very concrete set of communication tools with my “Hold Me Tight®” Relationship Enhancement Workshop. This foundation is to be used immediately to improve your communication and connection.
I understand you may be apprehensive about taking a workshop at the beginning of our work together. I have consistently seen through the years that this initial step shortens the time you are in therapy, reduces the financial cost and increases the long-term effectiveness of change. Please read about the Workshop and ask questions if you have apprehensions about this approach.
“My wife and I were at a standstill, plagued by negative behaviors, and after 2 days I really feel like we’re in a much better place, feeling connected and understood and heard, something we’ve lacked for a long time. We’ve been given the tools to reconcile and improve, which I’m thankful for. Now it’s on us to do the work.” — Mark, Hold Me Tight attendee, 2018
Optional Phase 2. The majority of my clients’ relationships are in such a better place after the Workshop, that weekly sessions are not needed. If follow-up sessions make sense, we meet together, strengthening the communication tools you have learned and your connection.
My goal is to have you self-sufficient as quickly as possible, so that you don’t require weekly long-term therapy.